Lately he’s feeling like a broken promise
In the mirror staring down his doubt
There’s only one thing in this world that he knows
He said forever and he’ll never let her down
Because We Can ~ Bon Jovi
Initially I did not want to hear a word of what Rebekah was telling me but as she eventually told me the truth, though with clear reluctance on her part, about my mother – my real mother, I was never more terrified. I scoffed at her even suggesting that I might be able to have a child, then laughed to myself knowing that was probably exactly how Damon probably reacted, and even more so because it would require approval from the witch spirits and he is certainly not on their Christmas card mailing list.
Though, it brought be back to the night at the Grill when his witch friend said her ancestor advised to let us happen. What was that supposed to mean? If it mean exactly this – a cold day in hell! When I finally came out of my stupor of shock, I was just more than mildly irritated by the fates.
I practically pouted over the situation they threw me in as I made my way into the kitchen were everyone was not so subtly listening in. Damon tried to make his way over but one look and he was frozen in his steps. “I am not going near you with a ten foot pole right now until we figure out what the fuck is going on for real and how not to let this happen,” I growled as I pointed to my stomach. I was definitely not mother material. Babies were cute, yes. But only when I could hand them back to their rightful owners because I would likely send it flying when it wouldn’t shut the hell up.
His eyes pinched as he held something back, making me look at him again but it was gone. I immediately looked over to Jasper who intentionally started a conversation about video gaming with Emmett, knowing he would never shut up once started.
Falling into an empty seat beside Stefan and grabbed an apple. “Nik is up to no good,” I admitted. “I think he was trying to compel me but it didn’t work. This is part of what you were talking about Rebekah, right?”
“Unfortunately. If or rather when you come into your gifts, you’ll be able to be compelled by the family. You still won’t be able to by other vampires because of your being half one already. I would be very careful Izabelle. Avoid him if you can or have the Bennett witch here bind you,” she shrugged.
I glared at her, wanting to ram the apple down her throat and make her choke on it. “To do that she would have to repeat what Emily did and I would have to leave Mystic Falls again. I kinda like it here. I want to stay. You leave.”
“It was only a suggestion,” she replied haughtily before walking out. I looked around the room to see what anyone else had to say on the matter but each person was purposely avoiding making eye contact with me. Cowards.
“Well if this is how this is going to be, I’m going for a walk. You all feel free to talk behind my back while I’m gone,” I snapped, growing more pissed off at all of them by the second. It wasn’t like this destiny thing the witches decreed was about them. No, it was targeted at me – and Damon. I still couldn’t figure out what that look was in his eye and it was bothering the hell out of me.
By the time I reached the old Salvatore property, I sat on the decrepit steps as I just let the stress of my brother turning on me and the unknown that the witches were expecting me to deal with loose. I don’t know how long I sat there crying, when Stefan had snuck up on me.
“Are you here to tell me how much of a bitch I’m being?” I asked, trying to wipe my face. “Because I already know.”
“Wasn’t going to say anything because I think you have every right to be angry,” he said softly as he eyed me. “Are you okay?”
“Am I okay?” I laughed shaking my head, fighting the feelings of hysteria that threatened to consume me. “No. I’m not okay. What in the world makes you think I’m okay with any of this?”
He was quiet as he walked over to sit next to me, looking out into the trees. “He won’t say it but he’s worried. Growing up, between the two of us, while he was always looked down on by our father, he tried his best to earn his respect. I always thought he would have gotten married first, had a family. Until Katherine.”
“Fucking bitch. I still want to wring her fucking neck,” I growled out, trying to gather some control over my emotions which seemed to be kicking my ass today. “Damon and I aren’t parent material. What in the hell are the witches thinking?”
Stefan only smiled slyly at me, raising an eyebrow. “I don’t know. I think you two may be more capable than you give yourselves credit for. He wants it but he doesn’t want to let himself have that hope. Think about it from his perspective. The two times he allowed himself to hope for love, was with Katherine and Elena only to be turned down. He was pretty damn close to shutting down again when you came back and he has that hope with you. And I’m happy for him. Elena – will get over it. She’s conflicted, but that’s because she’s always cared for him in some way and doesn’t want to see him hurt.”
“Yet, she was the cause for his hurt that help lead him to the path that he almost took,” I pointed out, probably a little too harshly but it needed to be said. He visibly flinched at the truth of it and seeing as he was making an effort, I decided to give it a shot as well. “Look, I can’t promise I’ll be like besties with the girl but just make sure she stays in line around me otherwise I’ll compel her to. I really don’t want to do that but I will if it means to keep peace with everyone here. Especially since we got other problems brewing so Elena is only a complication that isn’t warranted.”
“Alice. My compulsion on the Cold Ones, or at least her, seems to have worn off and she’s up to no good and wants Jasper back. She’s trying to track us down and so far hasn’t had much luck but she’s resourceful. She won’t be able to see him in this form but maybe in shadows so if he stays out of the public eye if she comes snooping around, he’ll be fine.”
“See? What?” Stefan questioned confused, making me smile at his expression.
Sighing, I ran my hands through my hair, holding it back as I looked at him. “Alice could see the future. It’s not accurate but it’s pretty damn good. Her visions are based on decisions and she sees the outcomes of those decisions. She’s never been able to see me because I’m a hybrid, obviously. Before I had assumed it was because I was an Original, though it could be partially due to that. It doesn’t matter that it was me that accidentally created her freaking race but that’s a story for another time…”
He stared at me speechless making me slightly self conscious. Shifting nervously under his eyes, I looked away as I explained myself quickly. “I was bored. And a little drunk. And a witch friend was new to her trade,” I shrugged. “Anyway, she’s going to be a problem. But this whole humanity thing, babies, witches, and Damon – I am still stuck on stupid with that.”
“Yeah…I don’t blame you there,” he said, wide eyed. “I just ask that you don’t discount him or yourself. It’ll be a little weird seeing you two like that if it even happens but if the witches think it’s a good thing, maybe it’s worth considering? You need to talk to him.”
When I didn’t say anything else, he let out a sigh and took a few steps back towards the way we each came. “Want to come back with me?”
“Sure,” I whispered, following a step behind as I let myself get lost in my thoughts once again.
When we got back to the house, I got my customary sneer from Elena as I walked by, causing me to snap my teeth at her with a playful warning not to mess with me. Stefan admonished her before taking her out of the house again, hopefully to warn her of my threat to compel her if she didn’t change her tune soon.
My eyes sought out Damon, but he was nowhere to be found. Frowning, I made my way to his room where he was on the floor going through some old trunks of his looking for something. Not knowing what to say after my irrational behavior earlier, I just stood there waiting for him to acknowledge me.
His shoulders had tensed at my presence so he knew I was there, but he had continued on with his search in silence. After several painstaking minutes, he finally spoke. “This isn’t exactly the life I imagined,” he said, looking at some photos that I was afraid to know what they contained. “But I accepted it for what it was after it was forced on me. I vowed to make Stefan’s life a living hell for damning me to this existence without Katherine, but initially I had wanted it because I thought I had loved her. You proved me wrong in that.”
I didn’t know what to say, but had taken his words as invitation that it was okay to come closer. Stopping at the bed, I was afraid at what his mood was like so I remained cautious until he showed his cards.
“You know, I never considered it a possibility. I mean we’re vampires. We know that having a family like that was a lost cause when we turned and if we had chosen it voluntarily like I had initially for Katherine, I gave up that would be life,” he continued, his eyes pinching with that emotion she couldn’t place earlier. He turned to look at her with an expression that just made her want to flinch. “And with everything, suddenly they might allow that little bit of humanity that our kind never get to have… Izabelle…”
“You want this,” I whispered, realizing what he was trying to tell me. If I were honest with myself, I did too, but it terrified the living hell out of me because for over two thousand years I lived accepting it wouldn’t happen and now the power that it might produce, the unknown of it was unimaginable. “I don’t know if I could do this though. There is so much going on that with Alice coming for Jasper, my brother wanting to control my gifts, that adding a baby that we don’t know what it would be is terribly frightening.”
I heard Damon sigh as I kept my eyes down, fighting back the tears that won over. He lifted my face to meet his worried eyes as he looked at me searchingly for a moment and shook his head. “No. That’s where you’re wrong. I don’t just want this. I wantthis with you. There is a difference Izabelle. If this option was presented to me months ago when things were going great with Elena, I would have turned it down in a heartbeat,” he said, trying his best to make me understand. “I don’t want that life with anyone but you. I don’t understand the pull or the desire that drives me to you, but it’s true and I’m not about to fight or question it.”
Nodding, I knew of the pull he was referring to. Jasper explained the sensation to me among his kind during the trip to Virginia after I freed him of his bond to Alice. It had to have been something that Circe including when we created the Cold Ones because it wasn’t something that I would have thought of. Was it possible that our kind had a similar pull, both having been created through forms of magic?
“So we’ll just let it happen whenever it’s meant to?” I asked, looking up at him cautiously. I was still unsure of this whole scheme that the witches had brewing but I need his reassurance that he was okay with it because it could cause a world of trouble in the future.
“I want everything with you so don’t try to think otherwise of me Izabelle. Now, tell me. What else is bothering you besides what you admitted about Klaus. We had a feeling he was up to no good when you two left earlier, but there is something else you aren’t saying,” he pointed out, simply by knowing me as well as he did.
Biting my lip, I knew Jasper was still in hearing range so I pulled Damon into his bathroom and threw on the shower before stripping down. Following my lead, he joined me in the shower, his lips quickly finding themselves on the curve of my neck making me smile. Whispering, I looked up at him nervously. “Alice, Jasper’s, for lack of a better term, former mate, called me on my way back from my day with Nik. My compulsion on her seems to have worn off, I don’t know how. I’ve never had an issue with compelling Cold Ones before so whatever she has done to get it reversed has me nervous. She wants Jasper back, and is more than willing to go through my friends and family to him.”
Damon frowned slightly and shrugged at her threat. “We’re stronger and faster. Let her come,” he said dismissing it. “Unless there is something more about this other breed that you haven’t said…”
Nodding, I fiddled with my daylight pendent. “Cold Ones can have gifts like ours. Though they tend to have only one dominant one. She can see the future though she has difficulty seeing our kind. Before she learned of what I was, she had admitted that it was like seeing a shadow of myself and so she made her assumptions on that. That’s not saying she was right or wrong, but she can’t see everything but she does tend to be painfully accurate. I fear she is gaining some very powerful and gifted allies and will come for us.”
Sighing, he ran an irritated hand over his face to clear it of the shower water as he looked up as he tried to process and understand the overload of information I just laid on him tonight. “So besides the witches wanting us to have a kid for whatever supernatural purpose they predict, we have your werewolf hybrid brother wanting you for your magic to control, we now have a demented fairy Cold One hell bent on revenge for you stealing her mate with unknown gifts at her disposal helping her?”
“I didn’t steal him,” I snapped. “He has free will. I gave him options and he chose freely. As did Emmett. She said nothing of Rosalie so I assume her compulsion is still holding. The only thing I can think of is maybe petition their royalty to do away with her but I would need a better understanding of the Cold Ones’ laws to be able to make a case against her for them to take action without us having to fight her.”
“They have royalty?” he snickered. “What? Are they the king and queen of the glitter pants parade?”
I just gave him an admonished look and rolled my eyes. “We’ll explain everything about them later,” I sighed, leaning into him as I was just drained from the long emotional roller coaster of a day. As Damon soothed my nerves and emotions by trying to wash them away in the shower, I leaned against him as my thoughts took off as I tried to think of options until we gathered our people together.